Bright Lights, Big City

This story tells about a man, who falls (bit by bit) into a peer group. First I didn't know how to think about it, but as I tried harder to understand what Jay Mc Inerney wants to declare with it, I found out that it's very simple: anyone of us could be this guy. Of corse, we have other expieriences and ..., but imagine there was none, who held you, as you needed it most and then, suddenly, it's imaginable that you fall into his roll. The author, doesn't only tell about the man, but he uses the second person, which makes the whole story more pleasant. (I have besided to do it the same way.)

( It's Six A.M. Do You Know Where You Are ? )

You are about 30 years old and have a lot of problems: drugs, alcohol, no real friend and no woman, who loves you. You are depressed and surch for some change in a shady bar. You try to get off with any woman, offer her drugs and talk about obscenities. You think about the good old times, as everything was certainly chaotic, but nice. You are frustrated by all you have done, but you are not strong enough, to give your life a new direction, so you let yourself go and stick to drugs, alcohol and sexual addiction. You try to start a new relationship, but that's not possible in such a surrounding and there's no way to impress a woman with the word "horny".

( The Department of Factual Verification )

On monday there is always the same bad daily routine: things, which seem to be impossible, have to be done and there is no pardon, if you want to keep your head. You have to disprove the doubts of the others, if you could manage it and they want to se your head rolling, but you don't give up. You are strong enough to do it without help and if it's only for your ego.

( The Utility of Fiction )

Confused after work, you dream of a silent evening alone, but suddenly your past consults you. You think about Amanda, your ex-wife and your childhood at next you get depressiv. You try to find confidence in writing, but there is only shit comming out of your mind. And suddenly your "best" friend is standing in your appartment, disturbs you and asks for some "stuff". He tries to bring you on other thoughts and gets you to know two women. You want to impress, you make something important out of your person. You hope to get finally your sexual-confidence, but you have to find out that they are lesbians and you're surching for help in your "coke".

( A Whomb With a View )

Having nightmares is one of the worst things in life: your biggest fears come together with the personifications of your hates. In comparison to it, your life is harmless. You recognice that there are people, who have more problems then you. You should be proud of what you have and what you once had, because none can kill your memories.

( Les Yeux Sont Fait )

You think about your life, how you learned to know Amanda, who you loved her, what kind of human being she was and how all ready you were, as she left you. You repress it all, but if you think more intensiv about it, you discover that she is the purpose of all that mess in your life. You don't need drugs, other women, ... you need only her and nothing else, but thats not possible. Magan, a work-colleague, tries to bring you up and helps you, what you are really thankful for.

( Coma Baby Lives ! )

You try to compare your situation to some streetpeople; you are disgusted of nearly everything around you. As you seem to be on the deepest point, your friend askes you for a favour: to go out with his cousin Vicky. This idea proves as wonderful, because you are fascinsted on her. She is a natural girl, lovely and sympatical. Although you know her for only some hours, you decide to put away your bad habits, especially the drug-abuse, because she is worth it to be yourself. You feel that you do not have to hide. You both find out about your common interests, swap numbers and addsesses and kiss in a way, you havent felt for a long time.

( Pygmies, Ferrets and Dog Chow )

You get pulled out of your good mood next morning and faster as you can imagine, your life has completly changed: you've lost your job and what are you going to do now ? You see kids and dealers on the street and imagine, if you will also end up like that. You deside that everything could be taken easier, if you take some "coke" by now. In the evening, still in the same condition, you are doing damn things together with Tad, your "friend", which you would never have done without him. If you see it clear: he changed you completly and you are sick of his business.

( O Couture ! )

Amanda is a model and by chance she has a performance in New York. You deside to go there and this time you will blame her. But beside all those snobs you are regarded as a loser, a nobody. Everyone thinks that you are a mentally disturbed person and so two security men bring you out of there. You feel bad, because she had seen you, but there was no impression by her way. She has distroyed all your illusions and now you are nothing better then any dosser. Who are you ? You've lost yourself together with Amanda and nothing could hold you now. Your self-pity is only pulling you down deper, but you do not recognice.

( Liguine and Sympathy )

Magan, the woman, who had never seemed to you to be one, excuses all your faults. She wants to have dinner with you at her appartment ! You are a male-being, so what do you think ? Yes sure, you think she wants you ! Memories about Amanda come up and you feel lonly. You try to remove all your problems, fears and sorrows by loving this Magan. She really wants to help you, but she keeps you from doing things, you maybe could regret afterwards.

( Sometimes a Vague Notion )

The next day is strange, you feel guilty, but of what ? That your life went wrong ? You see other people with their problems, but they seem ridiculous to you. You know that you still have some self-respect, but as wake up next, you find yourself lying beside a woman, you've never seen before and you feel ashamed. Arriving at your appartment, you are confronted with your brother Michael, who is still living in your nativ village together with your father. You get made reproaches about being selfish and not thinking about others (and there feelings). Your father, who had done so much for you, is missing you and mothers death is going to be one year ago tomorrow. You didn't tell anyone of your family that Amanda has left you, so Michael askes for her. What he knows is that you have lost your job. Than you start to fight, which lasts until you are naerly unconscious. Afterwards you recount Michael the whole story about Amanda and .... He feels sorry of all he has said and done.

( The Night Shift )

You think about your mom, her last talk to you, .... She said something strange to you about drugs: they had eased her pain. This is maybe an unknown excuse for you to take them. You didn't feel guilty of taking them, because your mother accepted it and so there was no barrier for you. When you are thinking seriously, you recognice that you only married to make your mom happy. Thinking about the family gives you a feeling of confidence. < I think that's the sign the author wants to give to us:> An intact family is the only thing in life that really saves you, but if you loose the contact, you are some kind of "bird-free" and could be cought by any bad thing in the world.

( How It's Going )

Tad calles you to come to a party. There you meet Amanda and she is totally changed. She is superficial and snooty and on top af that her new lover is bisexual. You feel as you have been blind all those years, not seeing, what happened. And than you recognice that you miss your mother and that you only have let your self gone because of that. Now the only chance, you have, to start a new life is, to pick it up from the very beginning and maybe Vicky can help you with it.

It's not important to have money or to take drugs, but to face the truth of life and feel all this (wonder-awful) pain !

The psychological background of peer pressure:

Peer pressure is the result of lacking social responsibility.

Kids do not know what to do or where to go, if they have problems.

Frequent "children's problems" are:

Bulling,

Family relationship problems,

Worries about others,

Physical abuse,

Sexual abuse,

Facts of life,

Pregnancy,

Problems with friends,

Partner relationships,

School problems,

Sexuality,

Parents' divorce/ seperation,

Runaway,

Homelessness,

Bereavement,

Smoking,

Depression/ mental health,

Health,

Drug abuse,

Loneliness,

Eating problems,

Suicide,

Request for resources,

and the risk of abuse.

The key lies in the relationship with parents. Parents often tend to be emotionally unavailable (perhaps because they are depressed or too hard-pressed) or physically not there for much of the time (perhaps because they are at work). That's often caused by the fact, that mothers have lost their traditional role and have become despised. The divorce rate has shot up and the proportion of children, whose mothers work and leave their children in inadequate substitute care while they are still very small has also greatly increased.

So kids search for fellows, who have the same interests and stick together to a group. If the others do somthing the kid doesn't want to do (for example bullying weaker kids), he still has to do it, because otherwise he would become an outsider.

Bullying is one of the most exciting acts for such gangs. Kids, who have been rejected by their parents, tend to also become angry and rejecting. They punch their feelings of being subordinated and inadequate (which parents have given to them) to someone weaker.

So their victims are often kids, who have low self-esteem. They are liable to have conspicuous physical problems or unfashionable hobbies.

The bullies often force the victims to do bad or dangerous things (like stealing something or doing tests of courage). A lot of victims suffer in silence, because they are too scared to confront their tormentors and too ashamed to tell their parents or other grown ups.

It's not seldom that, as a result, they either join the gang or (because they do not know an other way out) commit suicide.

So the message, drawn from the books I have reported, and of all these facts must be: "Until we close the gap between our fine words about childcare and the reality of our society, such tragedies will be increasingly common. All kids need real education, not banal schooling, otherwise they have no place to fit in. Parents can no longer bear the burden of children, who feel useless and don't get along with their fellow-men (especially with grown ups)."

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